Dryer Duct Coils (2)	$19.56
Silver Spray Paint	$1.96
PVC Hacksaw	$11.98
Retractable Utility Knife	$4.99
32 Gallon Trash Can	$9.93
15 Quart Plastic Bucket	$4.98
Cool Gray Track Pants	$9.72
Dowel Rod	$.82
Gloves	$.93
Ping-Pong Balls (package of 6)	$1.28
Quick Grip Glue	$2.97
White and Black Craft Paints (1 each)	$1.74
Stencil Brushes (2)	$3.44
Jumbo Plastic Bowls (2) (clearance, baby!)	$2.00
Total	$76.30

A small price to pay for the best pre-Halloween party ever.

The day after, I hurt so bad from carrying that thing around on my shoulders for the better part of 4 hours. As luck would have it, I had to wake up early and drive for a boring, radio-free hour to go play an orchestra gig. (On an unrelated note, R. Strauss and Smetana both suck. Suck suck suck! If "Moldau" is supposed to be a musical description of the river then I imagine it is a dirty little mud puddle full of ugly frogs and crickets and Czech zombies eager to gnaw my fingers off, all the while chanting "duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh" until the Czech cows come home. Get it? "Czech cows"? Instead of "cash cows"? Yeah ... ok.)

It took me forever to get the table in this post to work. Turns out in Blogger you have to remove all the line breaks from your code, or else it will include those in the spacing of the table. So stupid.

(Update: Here's where I got my table code, for those who wish to know. Link 1 Link 2)

Isn't it strange that being "up for" something and being "down with" something generally mean the same thing?

MY BROTHER IS SO COOL

RELATED STORY

OTHER RELATED STORIES

(these guys sound really good)
(my brother is cool)

I can't believe how good this article is. Not only did it give me newfound appreciation for Lester Bangs, it helped me understand yet another aspect of Van Morrison I wasn't aware of. It's strange because Bangs was so erratic - I've seen stuff of his that read like sensationalist fluff, but this is different, it's deep and personal and academic all at the same time. And the only things I know about him are what people say in interviews, and it's never nice.

But none of that matters because it's a great article and a great record.

This is an excellent movie. I was never really into the Band, but under Scorsese's lens they look and sound great. (Realizing there were major overdubs was a minor disappointment, and Marty's not the best interviewer, but whatever.) Lots of special guests - including Ringo on second drumset - make for a good show. I've heard from more than one source how Robbie Robertson hijacked the whole production and that no one else in the band was interested in the movie or in splitting up at all. Very interesting since he never sang any prominent vocals on any of their songs, but he was one of the primary songwriters.

Also, my hair is finally past the awkward stage between short and long where it just looks terrible all the time. I'm very happy about that.

Here's my newest creation, done on very short notice for this competition. Not so bad, if I do say so myself.

MACON, Georgia (AP) -- Little Richard built some goodwill in his hometown when he donated almost half of his concert fees to settle concerns over who was paying the tab for his show.

Macon Mayor Jack Ellis had asked local business leaders to pick up the estimated $75,000 bill, but they said they weren't given enough time to come up with the money.

Little Richard, whose hits include "Tutti Frutti," "Long Tall Sally" and "Good Golly, Miss Molly," told the almost 5,000 people attending the free concert Saturday that he'll return a $30,000 portion of his fees.

"It's not a whole lot of money, but it's from the heart," he said.

Little Richard's picture appears on billboards promoting Macon, and a recording of his voice greets callers at the convention and visitor's bureau.

There are tentative plans to erect a statue for the music star in front of a local theater. During his concert, the 72-year-old singer gave the crowd a few specifics for the statue.

"I'd like you to have some water coming out of my hand and every time it comes out, I'd say, 'Shut up!'"

Also: Chewie Becomes an American

Here is a collection of my thoughts as I ironed shirts and listened to STP:

1. Ironing takes forever. Seriously. I blinked and it was 5 AM.
   
2. You know how when you have a pattern of intersecting white lines over a dark background that illusory little dots appear where the lines intersect? Well, when I ironed that cool brown shirt with white lines that I ganked from Justin, it went bonkers and black dots jumped out every time I moved the iron. Bizzaro.
   
3. STP is way more metal than I ever realized. And with a few exceptions, I only like the songs where they let their guard down and admit to having pop influences. But if STP is metal, then disfigure my face and call me Lars because I'm metal, too.
   
4. Knowing Scott Weiland's predilection for all things smokable, it makes me wonder whether songs like "Sex Type Thing" are social commentary (cool) or autobiographical (scary).
   
5. Irons suck a lot of power and generate a lot of heat. You really gotta keep the cold air circulating.
   
6. All art is born of discontent, either real or imagined.
   
7. The groove for "Sin" is a carbon copy of the one for "Wicked Garden". The same goes for "Crackerman" and "Sex Type Thing". What were they thinking?
   
8. All art about love is based on a grossly exaggerated aspect of love, or an inaccurate, idealized aspect of it.
   
9. I bought Purple for two reasons: "Interstate Love Song" and "Big Empty". It was worth every penny except for the booklet, which ostensibly contained Mr Weiland's handwritten lyrics to such songs as "Big Emty" and "Vasoline". The only thing that I learned from that booklet was that you can't hide crackheadedness.
   
10. For the first time in my life, I have two weeks' worth of pressed shirts ready to go.

Christianity & Politics

Keep in mind this is from 2000, but there's still a lot of great stuff in here - including comments from Cal Thomas regarding the ultimate political failure of the religious right. I used to think he was part of that machine, but I guess not.

Good

Burger King, which first reopened its New Orleans restaurants by busing kitchen crews about 80 miles from Baton Rouge, has now taken the unprecedented step of offering $6,000 bonuses to hourly employees agreeing to work full-time for at least a year in the metropolitan area.

Better

Gervais must have needed help. The Reading, England, native was already a self-confessed sloth and budding late bloomer. After graduating from college in philosophy, he had performed in one rock band, managed another, and been a talent booker for a student union. Once they got around to it, he and Merchant created "The Office."

Best

According to various studies, reducing calorie intake is an effective way to prolong your life. Most theories place optimal intake below 1200 calories a day.

First of all, screw that. Secondly, what if it were possible to fulfill dietary and nutritional needs via an implant similar to the one used to regulate insulin in diabetics? I'm talking about eliminating the need to eat. Wouldn't it be strange to never feel hungry? And if you wanted to have dinner with the missus, you could just unplug a couple of hours beforehand.

Chalk one up for the revolution as Harvey Danger releases a record for free on the Internet. Bangin'. I hereby forgive them for "Flagpole Sitta". (Just kidding. That song was all right.)

You can also get about 90% of the Brian Jonestown Massacre's discography for free on their website. Not normally a band I would listen to or care for, but hey, they know what the future is all about.


"Future!"

Anti-Genius?

Now for an example of bad songwriting. I chose this particular track because it's in the same style as "A Million Ways" and because the same person produced both tracks, so production is no longer a factor. In fact, this particular song is very catchy, and I like it very much. But it is most definitely a case of good production propping up bad songwriting. (It's in the "music" folder.)

First of all, the melody is excellent, so it's technically good songwriting in that regard. But the lyrics are abominable. Whatever theme the song might have - "take me out" vs. "I know I won't be leaving here with you" - the lyrics fail to define and develop it. Certain lines do have an emotional effect - for example, "I'm just a crosshair" - but upon closer inspection, the ideas fall apart. A crosshair? What kind of metaphor is that? How can a person be a crosshair? Does he mean to evoke the feeling of looking down a gun scope at someone? Because if he is the crosshair, then he is being used to look at another person - which isn't the most obtuse idea I've heard in a song, but it's close. And clearly the song only involves two people, so you can add unintentional contradiction to the list of errors.

Notice how the lyrics are treated in this song. They are thrown around, placed haphazardly (especially "I say don't you know / You say you don't know"), and for the most part, nonsensical.

So if you're lonely
You know i'm here waiting for you
I'm just a crosshair
I'm just a shot away from you
And if you leave here
You leave me broken shattered alive
I'm just a crosshair
I'm just a shot then we can die

I know I wont be leaving here with you

I say don't you know
You say you don't know
I say take me out
I say you don't show
Don't move time is slow
I say take me out

I know I wont be leaving here (with you)
I know I wont be leaving here
I know I wont be leaving here (with you)
I know I wont be leaving here with you

I say don't you know
You say you don't know
I say take me out
If I move this could die
Eyes move this can die
C'mon take me out

Genius

This has been posted everywhere else, so I figured I might as well post it, too. Click that. DO IT! Watch the video for "A Million Ways". Any band that spends that long on choreography and also has great songs is a band I like.

Caleb, this can be the first in the "good songwriting" series. This is a great song purely from a melodic and lyrical standpoint. It is literally flawless. Disregard the production as much as possible (although it certainly supports the song very well) and listen only to the melody and words. Note the harmony plays a very strong supporting role and really doesn't move unless it has to, as dictated by the melody.

Pay special attention to the background vocals on the chorus. I don't consider this a production element because the content of the BGV's is a lyrical idea that perfectly complements what the lead vocal is doing at that point. It took me a minute to figure out what they were doing, and it's very smart.

Lyrics follow. They are perfectly balanced, with the syllables following the beat of the melodic line. Nothing is forced. Furthermore, each and every word develops the theme of the song. Absolutely crucial to proper songwriting, and most songs in general fail to achieve this.

Sit back, matter of fact
Teasing, toying, turning, chatting, charming
Hissing, playing the crowd

Play that song again
Another cup of Klonopin
A nod, a glance, a half-hearted bow

Oh, such grace
Oh, such beauty
And lipstick and callous
And fishnets and malice
Oh, darlin'
You're a million ways to be cruel

I should, I wish I could, maybe if you were I would
A list of standard issue regrets
One last eighty proof, slouchin' in the corner booth
Baby, it's as good as it gets

Oh, such grace
Oh, such beauty
So precious, suspicious
And charming and vicious
Oh, darlin'
You're a million ways
Oh, darlin'
You're a million ways to be cruel

On top of all this, the video is excellent. They deserve to be #1 on the Billboard charts for this (and awarded at least 3 Grammys). But they'll probably get a lukewarm tour and a voided contract. Smeh.

More Than You Ever Wanted To Know About Savant Syndrome

Dr. Down is best known for having named Down's Syndrome. But the cases of special abilities in otherwise severely disabled persons caught his attention as well and he coined the term "idiot savant" for these extraordinary individuals, linking those two words together because at that time the term idiot was an accepted scientific term for IQ below 25, and savant, or "knowledgeable person", was derived from the French word savoir meaning "to know". Dr. Down meant no harm by the term "idiot", and in fact he apologized for having to apply it — "I have no liking for the term. It is so frequently a term of reproach" he cautioned — but it was the accepted scientific term for a level of mental retardation at that time. While descriptive perhaps, the term "idiot savant" was actually a misnomer since almost all reported cases since that time occur in persons with IQ above 40. In the interest of accuracy and dignity the term Savant Syndrome has been substituted and widely accepted. That term is preferable to "autistic savant" because only about one-half of persons with savant syndrome are autistic, and the other half have developmental disabilities or other forms of central nervous system injury or disease.

Fascinating.

Challenge!

Aight. See if you can guess the songs that pose the questions that this list answers. Make sense? Good.

When playing rock-paper-scissors, once someone has won, is it justifiable to "act out" the winning motion? For example, in rock vs. scissors, many times the winner will "bash" the loser's hand to represent the crushing power that rock holds over scissors.

Is this really necessary?

Very interesting

The headline is misleading, and I suspect the article is more than a little colored by British perceptions of organized religion. It's not so much about "true vs. false" as it's about literal vs. allegorical.

It also gives a decent definition of "intelligent design" as it's commonly used. That's for whoever was asking about it - Dan, I think.

A good laugh to round things out

Link to article

A questionnaire filled out in 1989 by U.S. Supreme Court nominee Harriet Miers is being promoted as an insight into her views on gay rights and the law.

I absolutely can't believe that this is grounds for speculation. Just because there isn't enough public "evidence" of this person's views, we have to go dig up every conceivable document that could be used to interpret said views? Don't we have congressional hearings to determine the qualifications of potential Supreme Court justices?

You'll want to read the article, though. There's a real winner of a quote from Scalia. (I know at least one person will bite. Someone who is more than slightly anti-duck. Someone who should watch out, because hey, in 30 years you might be in the middle of a Supreme Court confirmation hearing, and Senator What's-His-Face will suddenly ask you how you feel about duck's rights ...)

So it turns out that Futurama is not only a great show, but a strange gathering of all sorts of talented people. First of all, one of the writers/producers was Bill Odenkirk, brother of Bob Odenkirk, half of the genius behind Mr Show. So there's the connection to David Cross and Arrested Development.

Then we have the voice talent. Very interesting. He's also good friends with Rob Paulsen, who you may know as Raphael from the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, or several million other characters. Billy West is no slouch, either.

The point is, who knew that digging around on the IMDB would uncover news of an upcoming straight-to-DVD Futurama movie? Possibly even more than one.

All this makes my plans for Halloween even more hilarious ... and apt. (Don't give away my costume idea if you know it. Oh ... crap. I mean, apt.)

Anarchy in the RIAA

I really enjoy the fact that the media seems to recognize what a waste of time DRM is. Hooray for media bias!

Tom Petty was wrong. Vocals are infinitely more difficult than waiting - and really, waiting is pretty easy, because all you have to do is suspend all effort. If you're a hardcore worrier, there's good news - you can wait while eating, sleeping, or doing any number of other things!

To sum up, vocals > eating too much > sleeping it off > waiting.

The Samples

Who are these guys? Anyone know?

I found out about them here.

Good article about the facebook

There's even a duck analogy in the user comments! Sure, not a flattering one, but I'll take what I can get.

This is a good movie. Great, even.

I remember Longwave's first record as being darker and spacier, but it seems they've reinvented themselves with cool "indie" artwork and a new power-pop sound. Something along the lines of Fastball. Good stuff, especially the title track.